Are You Stuck?

1591803996_1d7820a64d_o2016 is already 10 days old. How are you doing in achieving the goals you set out to accomplish this year?

Are you able to move forward as you had planned or are you already feeling stuck, perhaps you are ready to give up or at least renegotiate those goals? If so, take heart; you are not alone. Doubtless many are feeling as you do today.

I want to challenge you to look at why you are stuck and what you need to do in order to continue moving ahead with your goals for 2016.

Past failures. Sometimes as we try to move forward with goals to better ourselves, memories of past failures get in the way. When we begin to think in light of our failures we really can’t achieve anything meaningful. We start out with the best of intentions to pursue our goals, yet quickly remember our failures and become discouraged.

But negative self-talk is not the only problem. Others also are ready to remind us of our failures whenever they hear of or see us trying to move forward with our lives. If we are not careful we end up surrendering to their judgements of us.

It is time for you to move on from the failures of your past. No one sets out to fail in life. We fail for any number of reasons, including lack of knowledge or skill, lack of emotional control, unwillingness to listen to God or the wisdom of others, etc. Whatever the reason(s) for past failures, you need to learn from them and move on.

Refuse to continue living in the shadow of your past failures. The past is behind you, and there is absolutely nothing you can do to undo anything in the past. However, you can decide to not repeat your mistakes in the present and the future.

Past hurts. Some of us are stuck in past hurts. We have been hurt deeply by someone we trust. This could have happened as recently as last year or as long ago as 40 or 50 years. Someone took advantage of us and left us deeply wounded.

Now, here we are in 2016, stuck in the hurt of past and seemingly unable to move forward with our goals.

I recall working with a couple who had been married for more than 35 years and their marriage was in crisis. As they began to talk they both spoke about past hurts they caused each other. As I inquired as to when some of these incidents took place, I must admit I was a bit taken aback to hear each of them referring to incidents that occurred in the first year of their marriage. They were stuck.

If you are going to move forward in a healthy way in 2016, you will have to let go of past hurts. You may need to spend time with a counselor, pastor or close friend(s) for support to work through and release the hurt so you can move on.

The extent to which you are stuck in the past with failures or hurts is no one’s responsibility but yours. You, and only you, have what it takes to get unstuck and move forward in a healthy way for 2016.

What in your past is holding you back from moving forward in a healthy way in 2016? Let me suggest three steps you can take this week to begin the process of breaking free from the past.

  1. Take some time alone and try to identify what in your past is holding you back.
  2. Commit to sharing this with someone who can help you work through the negative emotions of the hurt or failure.
  3. Start living in the present free from the negative emotions of the past.

If you would like help in achieving your goals in any area of your life, call us at 208-880-0307 or email us at errol@errolcarrim.com to schedule a complimentary coaching session. To read Errol’s other posts, visit Christ-Centered Life Coaching.

Photo credit: Anna Tesar via Foter.com / CC BY